Red socks and Food-based Shocker

As Hugo tries to lick Graham's belly button, 'A Celebration of Fanny' comes on the television. Thankfully this is not one of those naughty channels weirdly slotted between God TV and the Motorhome Channel, it is an American cooking show extolling the virtues of Fanny Craddock. Phew.

Harbour of Collioure

We are sitting in Dickie at the Aire in Collioure in the south of France (thanks for the recommendation Anthony and Donna). There's free electricity, water etc at this time of year and no parking charge. It's a bit of a walk into town but the restaurants are good and there was a marche this morning (Sunday) with lots of free cheese and saussicon samples. After a few days of lovely sunshine a rather massive gale has started so, after our lunch in the freezing cold outdoor restaurant today, we will hunker down in Dickie until tomorrow when we head towards Spain. 

Matching lead/sock combo and great hair

Modelling the trendy outfit

With any luck Graham's footwear will return to normal - no more threats of the sock sandal combo I hope. This morning he asked if the red socks that were pulled up to his knees looked ok with his shorts. No - no they did not. There was a slight improvement when he pushed them down to his ankles but this was slightly negated when I realised they exactly matched our choice of Hugo's lead. Matchy, matchy.

By the Moulin

Animology 4Us

We watched in horror as, legs in the air, Hugo corkscrewed his way around a giant greenbird poo. The offending excrement covered him from neck to tail tip. May I recommend Animology FoxPoo shampoo as it did a great job removing it. Hugo was not impressed with his shower but, hey, that's what happens when you go rolling in s##t.

New Tyres R Us

Apparently it's not great to have wires sticking out of your tyre. Mr Fluffy appeared stressed as we searched for a French equivalent to Kwikfit but the (thankfully) English speaking assistants at Norauto near Montpelier sent us in the right direction. Massa Autopneus in Lattes were more than helpful and we would recommend them to anyone with tyre problems in that area of France. 

our fabulous mechanics

After working out how to explain everything in French to the workmen there I must admit I was a little disappointed that one of the mechanics could speak English. He even taught me how to say 'pneus', something I've struggled with since school. It's sort of like 'new'. We were in and out within 50 minutes after they had changed three tyres. Our two front ones were close to needing a change so we bit the bullet and went the whole hog. 

Heading down the coast again now, happy in the knowledge Dickie the van is happy with his new shoes.

Les Madames

Palavas Les Flots

Madame Dupont (the vet) responded very kindly to my terrible French. Hugo responded very calmly to his booster vaccine. M. Fluffy & I responded to the vet's bill in a rather shocked manner as we had to go back to Dickie to get more cash to pay it. Despite the 'larger -than-expected' bill M. Dupont was very lovely and thought Hugo was very handsome - a woman of impeccable taste. I neglected to inform her of his penchant for wearing my underpants and eating my knitted penis in case she called in social services.

 

snuggling up

We are in Palavas Les Flots, parked up by the marina in a very pleasant Aire not far from town. We've met a few French people on our walks with Hugo and I'm managing to improve my French in a minuscule manner. It is amazing how much one can learn about people while walking the dog. A glamorous fur-clad woman informed us that her husband had left her for a man but would not divorce her for tax reasons. This was within five minutes of introducing us to her Bichon Frise, Jerry. Her daughter is also wanting to change jobs despite her fabulous wage as she's sick of travelling. Ten minutes later we parted company and Hugo said goodbye to Jerry by extracting his face from his bottom and giving him a friendly yap.

Mr Fluffy practicing his circus training on the beach

Tomorrow we continue on our slow trek along the coast to Spain. We'll take it slowly due the sunny weather here. Now to brush up on my Spanish.

Loving the Light

Mr Fluffy looking angelic

Ripped sails at St Mandrier sur Mer

Poos

The tissue soiled with a smear of brown was conclusive. The gigantic poo Hugo in his mouth was undoubtedly human. 

mounting

takeoff

mid action

swinging

pre-dismount

I had just completed a thrilling exercise regime on the 'circuit sportif' (see photos of my athletic self). As I expertly dismounted from number 11 I noticed the offending item protruding from Hugo's oral cavity. Why someone would relieve themselves next to a piece of exercise equipment I do not know. Maybe because the route was known as the Crapa route......

After my initial panic and a short period of 'freaking out' we managed to exchange the offending turd for a bone shaped treat and continued on our way.

 

penis shot

Aaah the joys of dog ownership. I had earlier found Hugo wearing my underpants (yet again) and chewing on my penis-shaped knitted lipstick holder. Never two without three I suppose. 

Snow, Sand and Druids

The boys enjoy the beach

Love a palm tree more than snow

St Maxime, near St Tropez, is a busy port town. Mr Fluffy's undies are swinging from the side mirror in the slight breeze as the sun shines brightly, warming the aforementioned to a state of quick-dry snugness. 

Cold Feet

The road ahead

Our nail-biting snowy drive was short lived as we have hit the Mediterranean coast and the weather could not be more gorge. After our last couple of weeks driving through small villages in the centre of France it has come as a bit of a shock to experience such heavy traffic but we'll head off to Spain via the coast and it should improve.

Spot the Dickie

Our first rude Frenchman was encountered yesterday at an Aire not far from here. After being admonished by the wagging finger of the attendant followed by some tuts and shrugs for not parking Dickie directly next to a German van (despite them having their bikes in the space), we decided to leave and carry on to this much nicer site near the beach and port. Hugo has met some cute dogs although, in his excitement, he did almost de-leg a lovely red setter as he wound his lead around the poor animals long legs this morning. Thankfully his owner was English so we could manage the detangle fairly pleasantly. 

Votives in the Notre Dame de Roq in Castellane

We've even managed to find a Druid here.

Tableaux of menhirs and druids in Ste Maxime