Friday 9 January 2015

Animology 4Us

We watched in horror as, legs in the air, Hugo corkscrewed his way around a giant greenbird poo. The offending excrement covered him from neck to tail tip. May I recommend Animology FoxPoo shampoo as it did a great job removing it. Hugo was not impressed with his shower but, hey, that's what happens when you go rolling in s##t.

Wednesday 7 January 2015

New Tyres R Us

Apparently it's not great to have wires sticking out of your tyre. Mr Fluffy appeared stressed as we searched for a French equivalent to Kwikfit but the (thankfully) English speaking assistants at Norauto near Montpelier sent us in the right direction. Massa Autopneus in Lattes were more than helpful and we would recommend them to anyone with tyre problems in that area of France. 
our fabulous mechanics

After working out how to explain everything in French to the workmen there I must admit I was a little disappointed that one of the mechanics could speak English. He even taught me how to say 'pneus', something I've struggled with since school. It's sort of like 'new'. We were in and out within 50 minutes after they had changed three tyres. Our two front ones were close to needing a change so we bit the bullet and went the whole hog. 

Heading down the coast again now, happy in the knowledge Dickie the van is happy with his new shoes.

Monday 5 January 2015

Les Madames

Palavas Les Flots
Madame Dupont (the vet) responded very kindly to my terrible French. Hugo responded very calmly to his booster vaccine. M. Fluffy & I responded to the vet's bill in a rather shocked manner as we had to go back to Dickie to get more cash to pay it. Despite the 'larger -than-expected' bill M. Dupont was very lovely and thought Hugo was very handsome - a woman of impeccable taste. I neglected to inform her of his penchant for wearing my underpants and eating my knitted penis in case she called in social services.
 
snuggling up
We are in Palavas Les Flots, parked up by the marina in a very pleasant Aire not far from town. We've met a few French people on our walks with Hugo and I'm managing to improve my French in a minuscule manner. It is amazing how much one can learn about people while walking the dog. A glamorous fur-clad woman informed us that her husband had left her for a man but would not divorce her for tax reasons. This was within five minutes of introducing us to her Bichon Frise, Jerry. Her daughter is also wanting to change jobs despite her fabulous wage as she's sick of travelling. Ten minutes later we parted company and Hugo said goodbye to Jerry by extracting his face from his bottom and giving him a friendly yap.

Mr Fluffy practicing his circus training on the beach


Tomorrow we continue on our slow trek along the coast to Spain. We'll take it slowly due the sunny weather here. Now to brush up on my Spanish.

Saturday 3 January 2015

Loving the Light

Mr Fluffy looking angelic
Ripped sails at St Mandrier sur Mer


Poos

The tissue soiled with a smear of brown was conclusive. The gigantic poo Hugo in his mouth was undoubtedly human. 
mounting

takeoff

mid action

swinging

pre-dismount


I had just completed a thrilling exercise regime on the 'circuit sportif' (see photos of my athletic self). As I expertly dismounted from number 11 I noticed the offending item protruding from Hugo's oral cavity. Why someone would relieve themselves next to a piece of exercise equipment I do not know. Maybe because the route was known as the Crapa route......


After my initial panic and a short period of 'freaking out' we managed to exchange the offending turd for a bone shaped treat and continued on our way.
 
penis shot

Aaah the joys of dog ownership. I had earlier found Hugo wearing my underpants (yet again) and chewing on my penis-shaped knitted lipstick holder. Never two without three I suppose. 

Tuesday 30 December 2014

Snow, Sand and Druids

The boys enjoy the beach

Love a palm tree more than snow
St Maxime, near St Tropez, is a busy port town. Mr Fluffy's undies are swinging from the side mirror in the slight breeze as the sun shines brightly, warming the aforementioned to a state of quick-dry snugness. 
Cold Feet

The road ahead

Our nail-biting snowy drive was short lived as we have hit the Mediterranean coast and the weather could not be more gorge. After our last couple of weeks driving through small villages in the centre of France it has come as a bit of a shock to experience such heavy traffic but we'll head off to Spain via the coast and it should improve.
Spot the Dickie

Our first rude Frenchman was encountered yesterday at an Aire not far from here. After being admonished by the wagging finger of the attendant followed by some tuts and shrugs for not parking Dickie directly next to a German van (despite them having their bikes in the space), we decided to leave and carry on to this much nicer site near the beach and port. Hugo has met some cute dogs although, in his excitement, he did almost de-leg a lovely red setter as he wound his lead around the poor animals long legs this morning. Thankfully his owner was English so we could manage the detangle fairly pleasantly. 

Votives in the Notre Dame de Roq in Castellane
We've even managed to find a Druid here.
Tableaux of menhirs and druids in Ste Maxime


Monday 29 December 2014

Sun and Snow

Tap, tap, tap. Mr Fluffy's underpants were frozen solid. That's what he gets for leaving them out in the snow.
Aubignas

We've spent the last week staying in medieval villages in the south east of France and the weather has been stunning. Christmas Eve gave us a one night break from Dickie when we stayed with an old schoolfriend of mine from Australia who now lives in the Templar village of Richerenches. There were 4 Aussies and a Pom at the table - a bit unusual for these parts I think.
Gordes view

Gordes was the venue for Christmas day followed by Moustiers Ste Marie - stunning villages which looked even better with the sun shining on the surrounding mountains. I've decided I love olive trees. The colour is so soft and welcoming - aaaaah! What a shock when we woke up the next morning to see snow all over the ground. A lovely walk to the local lake followed and we returned - drenched - to head off once again.
 
Moustiers through the olive trees

Sunset at Moustiers Ste Marie

As a suggestion I would warn against driving around the Gorge of Verdon in a snow storm. After a tricky drive to Castellane we spent the night below a gigantic statue of the Notre Dame Du Roq and walked up to her this morning. it was not as hairy as it looked but, due to the overnight snow, it was a tad slippery and Hugo did a few scrabbling dances on the rocks and Mr Fluffy joined in for an occasional unscheduled skating experience now and then.

As the Tom Tom knows all and Mr F will follow it no matter what it says, instead of taking the main road to our current location (Nice) we spent a couple of terrifying hours driving over un-snowploughed roads adjacent to bloodcurdling drops to possible death. Mr F's white knuckles gripped the steering wheel with such vigour that he needed a shot of whisky and a block of cheese when we finally (and safely) reached Nice. The Tom Tom was vindicated as it did help us find an alternative Aire as the main one is jammed with Dickies.

Now to settle down for a night of Antiques Roadshow and a spot of Inspector Morse. Surprisingly the satellite dish still works this far south - hoorah!


A Soggy Return

It wasn’t the welcome home we expected - torrential rain, flooding, and giant potholes in pretty much every road we drove on today. Ugh! The...